waiting to bend

tell me a story
ill give you a nightmare.
say its ok,
and i’ll drown myself with those words.

give me a chance
i’ll give you regret.

so if its not me
waiting for
you to
spell it out
on a falling bridge, or
on my knees,
then i’m fighting the peace.

why is it
we always feel the fire
underneath.

that feeling of hate
eating out my insides.

i don’t have the strength
to feel humble

i don’t want to bend,
this is how it is.

you drill holes in your hands,
only to watch us go from loyal
to hateful.

how can you still love me?

i sink like sand

how can you still forgive me?

I can’t forgive her.
i can’t feel holy.

give me a life
and i poison it
with smoke

i’m not holy
i’m not holy

if i go to the truth
i will have to bend

so here i am avoiding it..

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